Name
Gwendolyn (:

take me to the sky

11:09 PM No school today so I spent my day sleeping with the Baby disturbing me by covering my face with her little blanket and stepping all over my head.

Wheels lesson was fine and my next lesson is on Saturday.

I'm peeling like mad and I feel like a snake.

I can never be satisfied today. I eat and eat and eat and eat and I'm still craving for more. Obvious symptoms that the period is coming.

I just want to be left alone today...the stupid guys are getting on my nerves!

8:47 PM Being a woman is such a pain in the ass. We have to suffer from period pains, moodiness and tiredness every month and then, there's the menopause stage where we have to deal with in time to come. It's fine if menopause affects only the person involved but it does not. Menopause affects everyone who comes into contact with it leaving the poor souls reeling after experiencing the full blown effects of menopause and still does not know what hit them. It is simply mind blowing and a little gesture may invite a full range of mad ravings from the sufferer. It is so suffocating to be at home nowadays that if I was given a choice, I would rather be out there, hanging around rather than experiencing the effects of menopause while I'm home. It must be the PMS speaking because I'm usually quite tolerant of the menopause sufferer.

Hitched a ride to school again on that yellow jeep and we arrived at 9am sharp to the start of our paper. It was kind of scary to see someone drive without their hands on the wheel, reading notes and not keeping their eyes on the road and not to mention that, the person nearly crashed into an accident site the day before. Being honked by other cars are like a daily affair for the driver.
3 hours break before the start of IBS dining etiquette test and the class went out for food and walked back to school after that. This class has been the best class that I was in and it's saddening that the semester is coming to an end soon. Hopefully, the class that I am going to be in the next semester is as nice as this or even better.

Yay! Wheels lesson tomorrow at 1pm. It has been ages since I last went for lesson and I'm really looking forward to it.

2:48 PM Woke up early for a game at RJC and the guys there are seriously...I've got no words to describe them. It was meant to be an alumni game and they were all out to kill their opponents. There were injuries and blood on court and an ambulance had to be called in the middle of a game. Why are they so competitive? Is it the school, the education they went through or just the guys themselves? I don't understand them at all and I had a bad morning. All was well after brunch with the other referees. Have to head down to RJC later for the finals. Arg..

I can hitch a ride to school tomorrow on a yellow jeep :D

11:56 PM It was an emotional day filled with tears and all I could do was to offer my shoulders and nothing else. I felt like a complete idiot standing there and staring at the 2 girls, totally lost and don't know what to do. Can't handle scenes like that..I don't even know how to cry like that because all I know how to do is to let the tears flow down but not cry and sob. I guess I'm too strong for all this emotional shit but I really did felt sad for my poor friend. I'm not good at comforting people because I don't need to be comforted by anyone. So really, all I can do is to be there for you and be your listening ear. I'm a real good listening ear because I wouldn't know what else to say except to listen and maybe give you a hug or two. I'm sorry..I'm just made this way.

On the other hand, it was a mother fucking tiring day! Woke up for lecture because I missed it last week and the lecturer wants to take attendance and so I braved the damn rain and went to class. The damn lecture lasted for half an hour and I was left alone to wait till 11am for tutorial and I wasn't around for tutorial due to a crisis.
Left to officiate at JESH for C' Division Boys Finals and it was a fast game. Turnovers were fast and I had to "defend" my own area in case my partner wants to fish in my area. Was totally drained after that and I got to make my way down to RP for POL-ITE games. Mentally and physically drained Gwen shopped in Cold Storage to get some drinks for someone and walked a whole long road down to RP myself. Was totally stoned during the first game and I just stood there when I saw a ball coming towards me. I've got ample time to avoid the ball but I just stood there and the ball hit me right on the leg. How dumb! It goes to show how tired and drained I was. Second game for me was just as bad. I had to keep reminding myself to keep a lookout for violations and fouls and to keep my eyes open. I guess I missed some but majority was called. Oh well, Friday shall be better i hope. My left ankle is feeling a bit loose again. Think it started on Sunday but only acted up today. Was a bit afraid that it will give way halfway through the game but it lasted. So I shall reward my ankle with a rest day and continue torturing it on Friday and Sunday.

Knowing the truth does not make the pain go away. It just seems to lighten the pain but all in all, you still have to deal with it. Would you rather know the truth or would rather be kept in the dark?
Emotions are running all over the place and good control is needed to keep it in check. The question is, how?

The fish seems to be biting...let's wait and see

Labels: Emo day

12:18 AM Watched "Hellboy" with the boys just now and I find it to be slightly nicer than "Batman". There's this scene which I love with Red and Blue singing this song together. I think there might be a Part 3 coming out sometime in the future.

You know I Can't Smile Without You,
I Can't Smile Without You,
I can't laugh
and I can't sing,
I'm findin' it hard to do anything.
You see, I feel sad when you're sad,
I feel glad when you're glad,
If You only knew what I'm go ing through,
I just Can't Smile Without You.
You came along just like a song
and brightened my day,
Who'd've believe that you were part of a dream
Now it all seems light years away.
And now you know I Can't Smile WIthout You,
I Can't Smile Without You,
I can't laugh and I can't sing,
I'm finding it hard to do anything.
You see, I feel sad when you're sad,
I feel glad when you're glad,
If you only knew what I"m going through,
I just can't smile.
Now some people sa y happiness takes so very long to find.
Well I'm finding it hard leaving your love behind me.
And you see,
I Can't Smile Without You,
I Can't Smile Without You,
I can't laugh
and I can't sing,
I'm findin' it hard to do anything.
Y ou see, I feel sad when you're sad,
I feel glad when you're glad,
If You only knew what I'm going through,
I just Can't Smile Without You

It's nice to hang out with the boys sometimes, especially when I feel like crap. All their nonsensical talk just keep my mind off things for a little while. It was a crappy day and my heart was in spasm when I was in school. I think I need to be left alone for a while. Officiating all day tomorrow shall keep me busy enough.

Labels: Tuesday blues

11:29 PM It's the annual basketball alumni at SRJC and we had lots of fun even though the turnout for our team was bad. We combined with 2 batches to make up a team and had fun playing with the seniors and juniors so i guess that was all that matters. The sun was hot and all of us were burnt and in pain now.
Couldn't wake up in the morning because of my sleep debt but i managed to drag myself to the court with the girls. Shot some 3 pointers today and i'm actually quite shock that i can still shoot. Dinner at Kovan was fun because we were totally unglam and laughed like mad. I love the girls because we talk about anything and everything, even stuff that you would not share with anyone. I'm lucky that I have them...

There's a new computer in the house. It's ACER and flat screen and it looks nice. It's also faster and works on Vista and i'm trying to get use to using Vista. I wonder what makes the father purchase a new computer in the house. I shall not complain since i get to use it too!

11:12 PM I'm back from Thailand!! OK I've been back for 2 days already but I've been too lazy to blog. The trip was fantastic, truly an experience and an eye-opener. The people that I went with, were also the best except for the weird guy who chased flies in the bus.
The days were spent visiting the various companies in Thailand to learn about their service standards and operating methods.
The nights were spent shopping at the various night markets, watching shows, clubbing or simply chilling in the room together.
Mornings were spent in gym, sauna room, breakfast table or somebody else's room and i checked out the wrong room because of that.
I wanted to blog in a chronological manner but i figured that i can't really do it. I shall attempt to at least remember bits and pieces of what i did from the first day to the last so that if my memory fails me, I shall have this post to remind me of what happened.
Baby and parents sent me to the airport to meet up with the rest going for the trip. Checked in and did all the stuff that has to be done before having lunch with the family and went into the boarding area. By this time, Baby was crying buckets of tears because she couldn't spot me. Boarded SQ 980 and settled down for movie watching while the plane taxied onto the runway and prepare to take flight. The last time i took a plane was 11 years ago and i was damn calm in comparison to when i was younger. Arrived in Bangkok at around 6 plus in the evening and checked into Amari Watergate Hotel. After visiting the rest of the girls in their room, 4 of us set off to visit Thailand's night life and took the Tuk Tuk to Pat pong for some night shopping. Didn't really get anything so we went back to our rooms for some supper.
The next morning was a tour round the hotel, Siam Paragon and Bangkok International Trade & Exhibition Centre. I think we fit in Chatuchak Weekend Market on this day but i couldn't be sure. Tiring day but we still went out at night for some drinks and show.
Third day was spent visiting a private hospital and Tria. We went to Suan Lum Night Bazaar for more shopping at night and everyone bought something.
The fourth day was spent at the airport, DHL and MBK. Clubbing at night was the highlight of the trip. That night, we didn't sleep at all since we went back to the hotel at 4 plus in the morning. Decided to go for a swim since it's almost daylight but couldn't so we went to the sauna again. Did some last minute shopping before we head to the airport to board our plane back.
Time for some pictures!

Labels: Thailand Trip

11:47 AM I'm leaving, i'm leaving..i can't believe that i'm leaving tomorrow and i'm not packed yet. I can't believe that a hectic week ended with me going to Thailand on Friday and coming back on Tuesday. Oh god, I can't imagine the fun we are going to have there! I'm so excited that i ran out of words to describe how i feel. Oh man, oh man..i can't wait to fly off!

1:46 AM New shoes, new luggage and hopefully a new me...

I need a new pair of legs because mine is quite sore from all the running I did today. Feeling quite weak as though my bones can't support me anymore. I'm old!! My shoulders are sore due to all the typing and late nights in front of the computer. Twen is so bored with me now, she sees me for 6 hours each night and she longs to sleep.

I'm so fearful of IBS that I delay facing it. The due date is staring at me in the face and yet, I have not prepared anything for it at all. I shall force myself to stare the "devil" in the eyes tomorrow after SIS presentation and hope for the best. CPF presentation is on Wednesday and after that, I shall prepare for my trip and probably finish up the draft for WISP. I have a crap shit full of work to do!

11:56 PM 3 on 3 at CCAB today was fun! The reward was something else but it was the chance to see a certain "senior" and talking to him that sealed the deal. Not to mention the weird guys who tried to introduce their friends to me and needing help to wear their bibs. Left at around 1pm for some boring meeting back at SBC before officiating BBAXN. My Saturday was burnt just like that! I'm left with IBS, CRM summary and getting ready for my Thailand Trip and they are all squeeze into tomorrow's schedule because i'm so tired now. I shall strive to finish everything by 4pm tomorrow because i'm due to be at SBC at 5.30pm. Luckily i'm not going for the wedding dinner at night.

12:19 AM It's the time of the month! I'm happy because i wouldn't have to worry about it when I'm in Thailand since it's here already!! Thailand, Thailand, here I come!

Class ended early today and I managed to reach home within half an hour of bus ride. Traffic is smooth and there's not a lot of people getting up and down the bus and it explains the super fast ride home. Napped for an hour before I head down to SBC for officiating. Officiated 2 games and it was a breeze because there's not much running to do. However, there are lots of fouls, travelling and whatsoever. Completed my SLM project and sent out my meeting minutes. I'm still left with CRM project and my IBS to complete. My schedule after the Thailand trip will be as bad as now if not worse because deadlines seem to be really crammed after that. No wonder it's call DEADlines. People will be dead trying to meet them. All right, I'm tired..

12:51 AM