Name
Gwendolyn (:

take me to the sky

9:28 PM It is Thursday again tomorrow and i am missing Psycre class. Not the old annoying man but the classmates that i have. The fun that we had and the totally in our own world even when he's teaching just made lessons all the more fun. The picture taking in class in total disregard to him was made right under his nose. Enjoy..



If i'm a guy, i must be the luckiest guy on Earth as i have 2 girls lying on my shoulders.




8:09 PM Woke up to an empty house today because the family left for Thailand leaving me in Singapore to fend for myself. If i'm not wrong, this is the first time i'm left alone without the family and it's not all good. Was actually quite happy that i'll have the whole house to myself during this period leading up to the common test as i would have no distractions whatsoever but it was not meant to be.I have to settle my own breakfast, lunch and dinner and i hate to eat alone! Glad that some of us went out for lunch after school today and thus, lunch was settled. The silence of the house also leaves me in a state of lost. I can't seem to do anything as the routine is all wrong. Came home and fell asleep on the sofa while watching TV and woke up 2 hrs later. Had maggie mee and now, i'm still lost as to what else is there for me to do. I know that i must study but somehow, the silence leaves me in a state of limbo. I'm not suppose to be here am i? I can't stand not talking to the mother once i come home and today, i didn't even get to talk to her before she left. Shucks, i should have woken up earlier even though i slept at 1am yesterday.

It's wierd as i always thought that i would purchase my own house once i'm financially able to but, i found out that i can't stand the silence and loneliness associated with living alone. Maybe it is because i am not used to it yet. Not used to waking up to an empty house with no breakfast. Not used to leaving the house without saying bye to the mother and Baby. Not used to having no dinner on the table at night. Not used to doing my own chores without the mother nagging at me. Not used to having the freedom of watching TV and leaving the radio on at full blast to counter the silence. Not used to worrying about the rain wetting the clothes on the clothes line. Not used to cleaning up after myself. Not used to this dark,empty and silent house. I guess there's lots of things that i need to get used to during this period of time when the family is away. Till then, i'm an independent girl! Things that were taken for granted before and the sudden loss of it makes me realised how lucky i was in the past. I shall learn not to take things for granted anymore.
Opps..did i change the tea on the altar?

CL just made me tear with her sms to see how i am doing being alone at home. So sweet of her to actually do that. Ya la..i'm touched ok?!

I miss my xin!

11:02 PM WOULD YOU BE THERE

If I were blue, would you be there for me,

And whisper in my ears that's ok.

Would you stand by me, let me hold you tight,

And say you love me one more time.

If I feel good, would you slow dance with me,

And touch my lips with tender loving care,

Would you die for me, would you run with me,

And never look back..

Would you be there to love, to be with me?

Would you swear that your love is always true?

Would you say that you'll always be the one,to take my breath away?

Would you be there to love, to be with me?

Would you swear that your love is always true?

Would you say that you'll always be the one,to take my breath away?

Would you be there..



The end of that fabulous show. The man that belongs in fairytales, when can i meet him?



When life sucks, officiating sucks too. Maybe i should subscribe to Murphy's law too.

Skipped school today due to e-learning in the afternoon. Slept my day away and only studied one chapter of OM. Omg! I have 4 days left before the first paper and by the speed i am going, I can say byebye to common tests. Please motivate me! It's lucky that blogger has the autosave thingy nowadays or i guess all my posts will be gone.

I'm happy because i'm talking to you online :)

11:53 AM Friday 25th May

Went to school for EC lecture just to know more about the format of our common test. Had 3hrs break after that because tutorial was cancelled. Spent 2 plus hours trying to figure out my EC workshops and i still can't do it. Tried asking for help but help wasn't forthcoming so i guess it's either i depend on myself or i shall just let it be. No time for it now so i shall continue on it during the break.
People are just so practical, they need help and they expect you to help them but on the other hand, when you ask for help, they'll say MYOB. Like WTH? Then please do not expect me to help you if you are giving me this kind of attitude.

Spent some time with Baby yesterday before going out to watch Pirates of the Caribbean. She's getting cuter and cuter. Can't imagine life without her at this point of time. She's my awakening! Pirates was good! Damn good and i like Johhny Depp in the show but i still feel that he can't really act in other shows. So stoic in other shows but so alive in this. Haha..Will Turner is still the cutest! Kiera Knightley reminds me of someone but i can't remember who.

I'm such a bitch and my life suck at this moment. I want ice-cream, popcorns, potato chips and chocolates to cheer me up right now.

10:11 PM Today was a great day even though i was late for phantom's lesson. Slept on the bus and woke up to find it still at Lornie Rd so i realized that i was going to be late. Went back to sleep and arrived in class about 5 minutes later than the phantom. She believed that we were caught in a jam and let us in easily. Her lesson was surprising sarcasm free today or was it due to me being in a better mood. Slept at 2am last night so the nap in the bus was very much welcomed by me.
Downloaded MYOB today and fixed Twen up again. Nowadays, i get paranoid wherever Twen "sneezes" so i'll get her check as and when i feel that she's sick. She's healthy at the moment so i'm happy.
Met my WCOM tutor while i was on my way home and i was surprised that she still remember me and my grades. Asked me about my GPA and encourage me to work harder. Told me that i could have gotton an A in WCOM last semester. She said the test did me in, since my projects and written work were good. How can she ever remember that when she have so many students? I can't even remember her name when phantom asked me in the first tutorial and yet she can still remember my name and grades. I'm amazed at their memory sometimes. Wished my memory is better than the goldfish memory that is currently serving me. The sun was bright and hot by the time i reached home. I love it..

10:56 PM I feel that i've been complaining too much lately. Complaining about how my class suck, complaining about my tiredness,complaining about my timetable, complain about this and that and practically everything else. I'm boring my friends and whoever that i meet these days. I don't know what's up with me these days. Short fuse cum my nature to let myself cool down before i shoot my mouth off doesn't seem to go well hand in hand. Oh well..it's a depressing period but i am sure i'll get through it very soon. I really hope it comes real soon because i can't stand myself anymore. Who's this dark, negative, grumpy, gloomy, tired, bad tempered person staring right back at me? I don't seem to know myself anymore and i'm losing it.



Friends? What is that? I seriously can't seem to define them anymore. Are those people that hang around you everyday called your friends or are those whom you seldom see and yet able to talk about anything under the sun with them called friends. Or is it those that will come to you only when they need help or something, anything called friends? What about those that comes to you when they have a problem and then forget about you the minute the problem is solved your friend? How about those that know that you're busy and yet continues to ask you out called friends? There are so many, so many different types of "friends" out there. Which category do you fit in? Negative thoughts again. I was there but were you?



There was a gigantic cockroach that flew into my room yesterday and till now, i don't really know if its gone. Was chatting with Jas online yesterday and it just flew in. Ask Jas for help and the only thing she could do was do be there "talking" to me while i chase the damn insect around my room. I'm usually not afraid of all these creepy crawlies as long as it is not a FLYING COCKROACH! Like what the hell? Fly straight towards my face? What am i suppose to do? I was imagining the worst case scenario that it doesn't want to leave my face and that it will cling on forever. Horrible thoughts..

Back aching like hell this few weeks. I don't know why. The worst was that i can't even lift my arms yesterday night but i guess it might be the late night and i was just imagining that. Tutor called while i was on my way to meet the girls for Kbox. Had to do an assignment on our trip to Power 98 and i'm suppose to inform the people in my class who's going. She said she's going to send me an email but i didn't receive anything as yet so i guess i don't have to do anything now.

1:09 AM Watched Spiderman 3 on friday after school and i managed to catch Spiderman 2 on Sunday so that means, i've completed the show. Saturday was spent doing some tutorials and attending Bao ma's birthday party. Had loads of fun with the girls and i laughed till tears rolled down my face. Love them lots! We even went to shoot some baskets at the arcade. What passionate bball players we are, Saturday also must train. Camped at National Library on Sunday and we managed to finish the first part of our project. At least something good came out of it.
Trying to finish up my presentation for thursday but i found out that i know nothing unless i have the rest of the slides. Shall do it tomrrow then. Went out for dinner at Swenson and had ice-cream. Randomness consumes me. Baby loves me! She kissed me today again. Haha her little actions just brightens up my day!

3:13 PM More pictures of my Psycre class and what we do in it while our tutor is not paying attention. He gave us the toys for some creative thinking thingy that we're suppose to do but we ended up playing with it. Claire's toys are of more fun and we love the wire thingy too.








12:36 PM



Pictures from Psycre class yesterday. It was obvious that we were having fun even though my goddess was sniffing away and trying to spread her germs. My flower head should have cheered her up :)


12:20 PM I'm totally lost in EC. Maybe someone can help me..common test coming soon and i do not have the time to study. Life sucks..am undergoing depression and i see no light. More thoughts in livejournal but shall not reveal it here since people do read my blog.

I think that Creative Stone totally rocks my socks. It is so beautiful and cost only 69bucks. I want to get the lime green one when it comes out and maybe, just maybe, it'll be my companion when i jog.

12:34 PM Another week's here and it is already halfway through. Oh well, i survived the shit and then found ways to deal with it so i guess i'm a survivor in my own right. I'm staring at a pile of shit right now, lesson is starting in 25minutes time and i'm wasting my time here at the library. I don't know what i'm doing. I don't know why am i so lethargic with no ideas and thoughts. I think it is because of the shit that i'm facing. It sucks..school suck and this is the first time i ever felt this way. Phantom was right this morning about the friends part and i think she is so intelligent. Heard that we have to choose our timetable for the next semester again and i really have to thank GOD for that. My prayers were answered. At least i only need to spend one and a half months of my life waiting instead of the three months that i had predicted.

The way to deal with slowness is to be slower than everything. In this way, you don't feel that they are slow. Instead, you will feel a sudden change of why they are actually moving faster than you. Now, they have to wait for me! Hahaha what a change! I don't want to spend the whole day doing the same thing and spending lots of time doing other not relevant stuff before starting on proper work. Oh well, if that's the way it works, then i guess i have to adapt. I'm sure i can do it since i have been in school for so long.

IEF project reminds me of PW in JC. All the readings and information that we have to find before we can start doing it. I got 'B' last time so i'm sure i can do it. Just leave me alone, i'm fine with being alone. Just don't ask me for anymore help.

Went for a jog yesterday. What a surprise that i actually wanted to jog and i really went. Muscles aching right now and i know i'm super duper weak. Haiz..all the gym work is wasted because i have not been to the gym for ages. Oh man, i just have to start my fitness program all over again.

12:45 AM Yea..it's finally the weekends. Was totally looking forward to my weekends because it had been a hectic week. I must try to finish my tutorials tonight as the weekends will be taken up by refereeing stuff. Sunday's Mothers' Day and i want to bring mummy out for lunch! Luckily i'm officiating on Saturday if not i will not have the means to pay for the meal. Had been depending on handouts this week. Felt super bad as i never contribute to the household allowance and yet i'm using mummy's pay for food this week. I guess i need to work more but there's no time since there is a never ending stream of work to do. I still haven't write my article for Contact newsletter which is due soon i guess. Oh well, i'll do it when i have the time and energy to.

And suddenly, i feel like sitting down at Coffeebean to study and have a cup of pure chocolate ice blended. I've never studied at Coffeebean at all and i don't understand why i have this stupid thought. It must be the lack of beauty sleep this entire week. I fall asleep wherever i am, whenever i could. The only day i was awake was Thursday because i was with my love! Once i reached home, i collasped only to die again.

Baby walked her first steps today! Omg! I was with her in this history making day and i was so proud of her. She took 3 steps before she collasped in my mum's arms. (Why not mine?!) She had so much fun walking and the smile on her face took away my fatigue. She laughed like crazy when i tried to make her walk towards me but somehow, she managed to turn and walked towards my mum. Jealousy reeks its ugly head here but she made it up by kissing me. Hurhur..all her saliva was left on my face after the super wet kiss. I fell asleep again before she left so i have no idea whether she was happy or not. Haiz..just what is wrong with me that i can sleep without the intention to.

Spiderman 3 next friday. I can't wait and i seriously pray that next week will be better though we will be starting on our IEF project, not to mention EC's project too. Managed to catch Spiderman on TV this week. I hope i can catch Spiderman 2 too but i got no idea when it will be shown on TV. What is TV? I've forgotton..

10:27 PM I miss the sun, sand, sea and the breeze. If only it was still last saturday where i had fun with my girls, some other random people and a certain hot guy. Cycling was fun, totally relaxing with the breeze in your face and the sense of power when i was on the bike. The control of the direction of where i want to go, the control of the speed of the bike and the control of whether i want to hold the handles just released the pent up tension/frustration that i had. We even went to Changi Village to catch a sight of the transvetites but we only managed to see two, when i heard there can be a whole bunch of them when it's the season.
This week is total madness! I think i only managed 4 to 5 hours of sleep every night which is seriously not enough for my standards. Fell asleep every morning on the bus and this morning was the best, i totally didn't know that i've reached school. Scary thought..what if i missed my stop and was late for the phantom's lesson. I think she'll haunt me for the rest of the semester. Lunch was good with Fish's company. It's been ages where i had lunch in school with someone in the same frequency. Someone who listens to me when i talk and not just pretend that she didn't hear me. I need that sometimes. It must be the time of the month because i find myself complaining a lot more than usual.
Claire is my goddess!

11:29 PM Eternal Summer..here i come!

It had been really hot these few days, so hot that my shirt was practically wet when i reached home today. How i wish i can wear sleeveless and shorts to school everyday and we are allowed to suntan on campus. I feel like shit everyday when i'm in school. I wish my friends are with me but they are not and i'm stuck in a pit. The irony of it all was, i chose this pit myself. No matter how slow i am, i can never keep up. 3 months of my life is going to be wasted on waiting, waiting and more waiting. How many 3 months do i have? Who's going to save me?

I slept for 4hrs yesterday.

12:37 AM Little children grow up fast, their looks change within months. Their intellect grew by leaps and bounds and by the time we know it, they have become so smart that we can no longer do anything about it. My baby is celebrating her first birthday tomorrow by having a big party with lots of food to eat. Loads of people will be turning up tomorrow so her parents decide not to waste money on a birthday cake but what's a birthday without a birthday cake? My poor baby!

I guess it's the time of the month again where i crave for snacks, candies, ice-creams, chocolates and whatever that is sweet and will rot my teeth. I wanted to eat ice-cream, potato chips and donuts today! So fattening if i ever feed myself all these so i'm glad i withstood the temptation and just had biscuits instead. Donuts will just rock my socks now but i hate to queue for the nice orange bag of donuts from Raffles City.

National Museum was fun, fun and more fun if not for the rain. I didn't know there's so much things to see, hear, touch and smell at the museum. Claire was my guide for the day and she made the day a little brighter with her cheeriness (if there is ever such a word.) She gets spooked easily and that's funny! We took photos and i shall wait for her to send it to me before i post them up. Cheerios!

10:12 PM Twen's up and running properly and faster than before. I'm so happy and the effort that i took to bring her to school wasn't wasted at all. Now i need to get use to the new Microsoft Office version that i have and the new internet explorer without all the tabs. I don't know how to download that version with all the tabs and stuff. I am such a computer idiot but i'm learning!

Labour Day Holiday
Spent the day catching up with some of my tutorials and then i went out with Mummy dearest. Took a bus down to Bugis area to pray. Stood outside the temple to wait while Mummy went in to pray. After that, she treated me to nice wanton mee before we went shopping at Bugis Junction. She bought me a bag! Another one for my brother too. Then it's off for dinner at AMK Hub. 3 consecutive days hanging around AMK Hub, i feel like a true blue AMKian. Ramen was nice but not spicy enough. At least it didn't make me cough again.

Tiring day in school today. Lucky that we are going to the National Muesuem on Thursday. Another day away from school. Weets..